Say What You Need To Say...: November 2008

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

THE NEXT SURVIVOR SERIES Six married men will be dropped on an island with one car and 3 kids each for six weeks.

Each kid will play two sports and either take music or dance classes. There is no fast food. Each man must take care of his 3 kids; keep his assigned house clean, correct all homework, and complete science projects, cook, do laundry, and pay a list of 'pretend' bills with not enough money. In addition, each man will have to budget in money for groceries each week. Each man must remember the birthdays of all their friends and relatives, and send cards out on time--no emailing. Each man must also take each child to a doctor's appointment, a dentist appointment and a haircut appointment.
He must make one unscheduled and inconvenient visit per child to the A & E. He must also make biscuits or cakes for a social function. Each man will be responsible for decorating his own assigned house, planting flowers outside and keeping it presentable at all times. The men will only have access to television when the kids are asleep and all chores are done. The men must shave their legs, wear makeup daily, adorn himself with jewellery, wear uncomfortable yet stylish shoes, keep fingernails polished and eyebrows groomed.
During one of the six weeks, the men will have to endure severe abdominal cramps, back aches, and have extreme, unexplained mood swings but never once complain or slow down from other duties. They must attend weekly school meetings, church, and find time at least once to spend the afternoon at the park or a similar setting. They will need to read a book to the kids each night and in the morning, feed them, dress them, brush their teeth and comb their hair by 8:00 am.
A test will be given at the end of the six weeks, and each father will be required to know all of the following information: each child's birthday, height, weight,shoe size, clothes size and doctor's name. Also the child's weight at birth, length, time of birth, and length of labor, each child's favourite colour, middle name, favorite snack, favorite song, favorite drink, favorite toy, biggest fear and what they want to be when they grow up. The kids vote them off the island based on performance.
The last man wins only if...he still has enough energy to be intimate with his spouse at a moment's notice. If the last man does win, he can play the game over and over and over again for the next 18-25 years eventually earning the right To be called Mom!

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Last weekend I met up with my BFFs from 8th and 9th grade in Indiana. Meg lives walking distance to Capitol Hill so we shacked with her, saw the sites, laughed at old pics and ate a lot of great food. I took the 2nd and 3rd ever cab ride of my life and saw the real Constitution (There really is something on the back of it). Need I say more? I have the best friends I could ask for. They put up with me so gracefully. I also have the best husband ever. He had no problem letting this be the year of me. Life rocks.

The White House - tourists get a terrible view, Washington and WW II monuments and..."I'm just a bill, yes I'm only a bill, and I'm sitting here on Capitol Hill."

Washington Monument - Steph's professional psychological opinion...totally phallic.

Wise old Abe...

DC World War II Memorial

World War I Memorial

Dinner in old town Alexandria, VA on the water at Chart House - soooooo good. Overlooked the Potomac which Meg informed me has the 2nd highest body count per capita. That's why the water tasted so good.